@luusi (nsfw language)

[grief]

OKAY so it has come to my attention that some of you lot haven't had elementary sex education, so I'm just a tiny bit curious about what all you do and don't know about getting a legover.

Tell me if any of this means anything to you:

Handjobs
Blowjobs
69ing
Eating Someone Out
Orgy
Pegging (am I expecting too much with this one?? Who knows.)
Rimming
Do you know what a vibe/dildo might be?????

This is especially for all you ye olden folk out there, since there seems to be a lot of that going on. But Especially Especially for all the ancient Chinese cosplay blokes out there. I refuse to believe my ancestors were so fucking vanilla LMAO like you HAVE to have different words for it or something PLEASE.

Comments

@Jiang.Wanyin

[legbreakings]

Do you have no shame!

There are ladies on the network!

[grief]

Ladies who have fucked before I hope LMAO

@cal.amari

[kinkprofessor]

I know at least one of those blokes is more familiar with it than the others.

[ Because, you know, that's his doing. ]

not here

[legbreakings]

[ Ew.

Ew.

He can figure out the rest. Unfortunately.

But. Ew.

There is such a thing as too much information, Huaisang. ]

[grief]

Definitely not enough details in this post to satisfy me LOL

@wei.wuxian

[mannerless]

For the record, Jiang Cheng knows at least a couple of those things. He just doesn't want to say so in front of our sister.

not here

[soups]

❰ she's definitely reading this and is kind of relieved, actually ❱

[grief]

omg so he's just repressed.

He's got some issues about knowing women want the P/V too I guess. Is he one of those ~No One Shall Touch Or Gaze Upon My Forcibly Virginal Familial Charge~ type of dudes because that's definitely a little old fashioned. Problematic much haha

text - un: song.zichen

[snowflicks]

[There's an inkling in his mind that this may be his fault in some way.]

perhaps this is a bit much for the public

[grief]

Oh my god you are so repressed. ALL OF YOU!! This is a death world where nothing matters, how are you NOT fucking until you die??? YOU COME (LMAO) RIGHT BACK

Maybe that's too big an expectation when I had to demonstrate a BJ to you lmao

@r.o.s.i.e.

[r_o_s_i_e]

I have extensive knowledge of all those!
If people here might need a proper sexual education, I'd be more than happy to help with that.

[grief]

You continue to entice me you mechanical tease.

@bombshell

[bombshelled]

alright! when did the Techs bring in a writer for fucking Cosmo.

what gave you the idea to play a network-wide game of Never Have I Ever?

[grief]

I had to tell a guy what a blowjob is and didn't know just how rampant this vanilla way of living was.

Text - un: nie.huaisang

[porndealer]

Oh! Oh! I know some of these!

Actually... I think I know most of them. At least from talking to Klaus, he tells me all sorts of fun things.

[grief]

Finally someone I assume is some ancient chinese guy who knows WTF is up.

Proud of you, mate. Keep up the good work.


WAIT WAIT do you know most of them or KNOOOOOOWWWW most of them, get the drift???

@sadi

[singularwidower]

These are your colloquial names for the various acts, I take it? I am always surprised at how little language changes when it comes to describing sex.

[grief]

I wasn't going for too complicated of terminology tbh I felt kind of grateful knowing they at least knew what dicks were.

@jingyi

[gusumouthcannon]

Okay so I am the opposite of grateful that I now know way too much about my seniors, but you say these like I'm supposed to know and who am I supposed to ask?!

[grief]

IDK honestly but I guess I'm sad you don't. I feel like porn or your parents should have told you something but I don't know your individual situation.

Anyway, want a rundown??

[seaboard]

I am afraid I have heard none of these things?

Must it be spoken of so... openly.

[legbreakings]

[ Gilia no! Gilia, why did you read this! Worse, why would you respond! ]

@atlas

[theprezident]

why

@scout

[skittering]

why

un: jegerkaptein

[bearhole]

wow, you're having fun, huh?

where's a bowl of snacks when you need it?

[grief]

❰ she sends this picture. ❱

U want some love?

text;

[backpacking]

uh, gross?
talk about not safe for (net)work?

is this actually really necessary

text;

[shivving]

[ all his worst nightmares are coming true ]

ellie put down your phone

@joel.miller

[shivving]

[ jesus christ why. Why is this happening. ]

you really gotta plaster this shit all over the goddamn network?

[grief]

❰ and the answer is very simple: ❱

Yea.